Keep It Close

Did you know you don't always have to tell everyone you love everything you're thinking, working through, and dreaming? Even if you love them, you don't. I recently told my best friend, "I dare you to not tell me about XYZ." There was something she wanted to share, but I could tell in her voice she wasn't ready to share it with me, so I let her off the hook. She laughed, thanked me, and I still don't have a clue about XYZ... If and when, I will. 

I didn't tell anyone I know about this account until I had to, and most who know about it now didn't even know until it was almost two years old. Why? Because I wanted something for myself, to flex on, to try and err with, to bloom into without anyone's thoughts or opinions clouding the direction and unfolding of my expression (I'm very sensitive to this, so this was a very intentional boundary). This account was anonymous for over 1.5 years before I put my face or name on it.

I guess I'm learning that you don't have to share everything with all your inner circle all the time. Even if you're crazy about them! In fact, I dare you to not if any part of you feels reticent. It could be a healthy stretch for you to hold certain cards close (nod to my brother-in-law's wisdom here), and honour your own process. Give yourself permission to not share things prematurely. You're allowed to test things. You're allowed to fail without an audience. You're allowed to unpack your life the way and the pace that jives best with your heart. You're allowed to want to surprise people… My world loves me so much that sometimes I fear their excitement will overwhelm my pace or processing and I'll revert to patterns I'm trying to break. I know they'll be my biggest cheerleaders in time, I just need to own my decisions first.

This post isn't about accountability, or collaboration, or the value of cheerleaders in our lives. Yes, to all those things, obviously :) Most of us would be nowhere without those things. This is simply a nod to those needing a little space, time, permission, and encouragement to lay low until the time is right.

Go get’r, your way!